Is there anything more thrill seeking than catching somebody in their own lie? Sure, skydiving is cool, but have you ever seen the look on somebody’s face when you catch them redhanded? Bungee jumping might be awesome, but so is hearing a liar squirm and trying to explain themselves.
It is this thrill that sees us comb through the social media profiles of the person we suspect of untruthful behavior, like some sort of detective trying to solve a big case. A majority of the time we find no incriminating information – other than some questionable selfies – which can make you feel a little bit foolish. However, just when you vowed to never browse your partner’s phone while they are in the shower again, a story highlighting the importance of trusting your instincts comes to your attention. Of those stories, they don’t get much better than this… “Gather round boy and girls because it’s time for the story of my cheating ex-wife and how I f*cked her,” Reddit user, Itsme03 began.
“So I had a feeling she was cheating as she set off a lot of red flags. Constantly laughing and smiling when texting, saying it was just her mother when I asked. Needing to stay late every night after work. When I’d call in her co-workers said she left hours ago. When I asked her what was going on she’d laugh it off and say it was just something they did to each other at the office all the time.”
“The last straw to where I knew something was definitely up was when she went out ‘to get milk’ at 11:30 at night and didn’t come back till 2 in the morning.”
“Fast track to her birthday, several months down the road. Now I know what you’re thinking, why the hell did I wait months before I confronted her and did it really need to be on her birthday? The answer to the first question is I wanted as much evidence as possible to hand off to my lawyer as well as make arrangements to find a new place to live, etc.”
“Answer to your second question is of course it had to be on her birthday. You see after asking her what she wanted to do on her birthday this year she was rather [insistent] on me going out of town with my friends as she just had to work anyways and didn’t want to be reminded she was ageing.”
“So I know something is up and after finding a bottle of champagne and two glasses hidden in my closest something in my snaps. So I do what any sensible man would have done. I leave and go to my friends house pretending like I am going out of town. While there I call up her mother, father, sister and several of her friends. I tell them how I want to give her a big surprise by sneaking into her room with party streamers, kazoos and a big cake with candles. Sounds fun right?! Well boy was it.” “It’s 8:30 in the morning and I have everyone met just outside our apartment. We all pile in the elevator (about 8 of us in total), her mother holding the cake and me reminding everyone to be as quiet as they can be. [I] put my key in and unlock the door, we all sneak in and make our way down the hall towards the bedroom. Each hold a kazoo and Mom holding the cake grinning from ear to ear.”
“Well as I throw open the door and we all yell surprise. But the surprise was on us and there was my wife, bent over in doggy style position with her lover staring at us wide eyed mid thrust. Mom drops the cake, sister screams, father begins to shout. I pretend like I’m horrified to which her friends try to push everyone out while yelling at her. Wife, excuse me, ex-wife is sobbing and screaming how could I while the lover is desperately trying to put his pants on while running out of the place. Needless to say, it was one of the best birthday presents I have ever given.”
Unsurprisingly the sensational story attracted a lot of attention on Reddit as users clamored to send their support to the husband, and some less than polite messages to his ex-wife. As people begged the user to share more details of what happened after he got his revenge, he sent an update which provided even more scandalous details. “To be honest it was funny as hell at first. I tried to disguise my laughing by pretending I was choking up. After so long of being betrayed I was the one who got to have the last laugh. Plus since I had hired the private investigator I was able to prove she was using my money to pay for things for her lover; hotels, dinners, etc. So I did get some compensation for that.”
There can be no denying that ‘Itsme03’s’ story – which reads like the premise to the latest James Franco comedy – is one of the best ever shared on Reddit. We just hope that he is now happy having moved on and started again. Although if he finds himself in the same situation again, he could always try this approach:
After she thought her boyfriend was cheating, this patient girlfriend called in professionals to help catch him in the act. What they caught on camera will shock anyone in a relationship.
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